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I know your goal is not to meet as many men as possible, but to meet your man, the one who is going to add more meaning to your life. Setting aside for a moment the logic that you can’t meet your man if you don’t meet any men, there is another reason to throw the net wide.
Let’s say that you meet only one man in three years. You might think he is line-or, even better, perfect for you. But since you have nothing to compare him with, you risk settling for less than you deserve. No one is perceptive enough to call it correctly with only one choice.
As much as you might love to act like a marksman, picking out a single target, taking aim, and shooting, you can’t just pick your ideal man out of the crowd with Cupid’s single shot. I suspect you’ve already ‘discovered on occasion that even when you think’ you have hit the bull’s-eye, you have instead missed the mark completely! A single shot does not allow you to choose the best for yourself And, you never, ever want to settle.
If you want to have a better chance of finding the right guy, you have to begin with meeting more men. Not one more, not two more, but a lot more. The more men you meet, the more you increase your chances of finding the right one.
Imagine attending a party where there are two hundred men in the room. Out of these two hundred guys, how many would you feel even remotely attracted to? Maybe twenty? Out of this twenty, there might be only ten to whom you felt enough attraction to consider a first date.
From this remaining ten, how many would you feel sufficient chemistry with to want to date again? Five? And from these five last men standing, there may be only one with whom you could deeply connect.
Many might say that even these figures are wildly optimistic. In which case, how long will it take to find your guy if you’re meeting only one new man each week? Anywhere from four years to . . . you won’t live that long.
In this scenario, you’re left relying on fate, which is like hoping to get rich playing the lottery.
~ Matthew Hussey
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